.." I thought about that bitch of a step sister of mine and how much I hated 'er! Fuckin' 'goody two shoes' bitch! Me Mom had already got 'er when 'er...an' me Dad met an' she's a couple of years older than me an' we've never got on - mainly cos she's a fuckin' tell tale cow an' I wouldn't trust 'er as far as I could throw 'er! Couldn't wait for 'er to fuckin' leave home an' get married to that wimpy fiance of 'ers! 'Timothy', fuckin' stupid name, if ya ask me? Anyway, we pull up outside her. "Julie's very brief eye contact with me, asks the silent question "did youhear your mother?" but she quickly returns to smiling politely to my motheras she tries to defuse the awkward situation "Nonsense. Thank you for yourcompliment but I'm very happy with the way that I look and your son hadbetter be happy with it too, because I'm not changing for any man."For a couple of minutes, my mother and I make small talk about the old days.Then out of the blue, I ask the question that has been on my. Heiss durchlief es mich. Wo waren die Bilder von mir mit diesem riesigen roten Dildo, den Rainer damals fuer mich gekauft hatte? Und die Bilder, wegen denen ich hier saß - die Bilder mit diesem suessen Maedchen, die wir in der Bar aufgelesen und betrunken gemacht hatten, um etwas Spass mit ihr zu haben?Ich spuerte, wie ich beim blossen Gedanken an diese Bilder, die ich seit einer Weile nicht mehr gesehen hatte, nass wurde. Ich klickte die externe Festplatte an. Da waren sie, meine geheimen. It's a cultural thing, it's a religion thing. I cannot beat it. I am weak and I am nobody.My hands were shaking as I took my phone out and called Hassan.Me: "It's over. Samer and I are done." - I said through tears.Hassan: "I am so sorry to hear you cry about him, please, let's meet for a drink. There is nothing a coffee can't solve."Me: "Screw coffee, I can't go anywhere. I am breaking down, sitting on a bench, people looking at me in shock thinking I'm on d**gs or something."Hassan: "I'll be.
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